I have multiple personalities.
Well, that statement isn’t entirely true. Let’s say
I have had multiple personalities during my life. You know, those things that
can come to define us as a person, even if for a short time.
As a child, I was head and shoulders taller than
anyone in my class, the girl who received the taunts on the playground about
being the “fatty”, even though I was just normal-sized for someone my height.
In my teens, I was an insecure rebel. I played
sports which helped boost my self-esteem, but I still pushed the limits. I was
the typical angst-ridden teenager with big opinions.
In my early 20’s, I became a wife. My husband and I
had a few years of travel and recreation. In my late 20’s I became a mother. My
energy was then used to try to build a home and raise decent little humans. I
was involved in community projects and local clubs. My desire to really “be someone” was huge.
My thirties came, and I got busier--between
working and my girl’s involvement in sports and clubs, it was a merry-go-round
all the time. School, 4-H, basketball, church…life was a treadmill.
My forties only managed to get even busier, as my kids
got older and more involved in things, and my husband and I began to travel
some again. My daughters graduated and left home, and my life slowed down a
bit, and turned more to work.
My fifties saw a change when we relocated. Different
jobs and challenges were offset with a whole new area to explore and fun adventures
were a weekly occurrence. I experienced life outside the small town.
My sixties have seen us move back home to be able to
once again enjoy our family and the changes it is experiencing with the
addition of sons and grandbabies. Life moves a little slower than it used to,
with a lot less responsibility that it did in our younger years. Hair is grayer,
body a little stiffer.
These days, when I look at my social media I can see
myself in other’s posts. I see myself as a new mom, struggling to keep my
sanity in a barrage of diapers, trying to stay the course with all the kid’s
antics and stages. I see that young woman determined to “be somebody”,
sometimes with an excess of explaining and posturing. I see that sports mom,
out enjoying every game and every small victory. I see those brave souls who
have traded their safe, comfy, everyday life for adventure. I go on every
vacation and enjoy seeing places that I have not been, as well as revisiting
those I have been to. I see the other grandmothers proudly showing their grands
with much love. You see, I have been all these people. I have had happiness and
heartache. I have soared with the eagles and hooted with the owls. Like a chameleon, I have
changed my colors a million times.
I find it interesting that people in general seem to
have a great intolerance for anyone unlike themselves. It seems that they forget
that, at one time, they could have been that person. Brash and hard spoken.
Hard headed and stubborn. Quiet and
insecure. Fearful and unsure. We all change and evolve, some more than others. I
love to look back at old photos, with the awesome hairstyles and trendy
clothes! But most of all, I wish I could tell that young girl a few things!
Things like,
Don’t
worry so much what others think.
Stop
baking yourself in the sun.
You
are not as fat as you think you are.
You
are so much smarter than you give yourself credit for.
Your
talents are a gift, use them more.
Enjoy
every minute with your babies-they grow up too quickly.
Enjoy
your knees, you will miss them when they are gone.
Same
for your teeth.
If everything goes as it should and we are truly
experiencing this life, we are bound to change. Things don’t bother me like
they used to. I don’t take other’s opinions to heart as I did in a younger
version. I am content to have a different opinion than others, and I am not always
compelled to tell them so (which I would have at one time.) I’m OK moving at a
slower rate and “smelling the roses”. I
look forward to the future, and hope it is as much fun as the past has been!
Peace, friends!
Peace, friends!
